Fade Step
by nanasawayuri
Summary: Solas' story of how he fell for the Inquisitor, betrayed the Inquisitor, and his journeys through the Fade.
1. Introductions

Chapter 1: Introductions

I didn't know what to feel. Hatred? Content? Love? Maybe I was supposed to feel nothing at all, but I, an elf, let my emotions run free. And it was all her fault.

The breach and its demons infested Thedas because some elf killed The Divine. Now she has this mark on her hand. I have studied it but cannot understand its power. I have tried all types of magic on it to get a rise out of it, but there's nothing. It only responds to the rifts in the sky. Could she close them? She must be connected to them somehow. Maybe born from this magic?

I studied her face. Her skin so light and lips so pale. I was afraid she would not wake up. I glanced at the Dalish tattoo on her forehead. From the bridge of her nose sprouted the roots and branches of a tree onto her forehead. This poor elf. Being raised by the Dalish. How annoying. The Dalish have so many rules and teachings. Everything is so strict you are not allowed to do anything. Was she born from the rifts to become an illusion to me? Maybe a rift infested her Dalish camp and that's how she got the mark on her hand? No, that can't be it. She killed The Divine and that mark has something to do with it. What purpose would bring her to The Divine in the first place?

I wish she would wake up. I have so many questions.

But my thoughts were interrupted with the sound of Cassandra's boots stamping down the hallway. I took one last look at the elf laying in front of me before I heard Cassandra's keys jingling in the lock of the cell.

"Let's go Solas. I need you at the gate to help support my men. The breach is getting stronger and more rifts are appearing," Cassandra ordered me.

"I need more time. Let me stay with her until she wakes up. I have questions for her. I need to see how this magic affects the rifts," I said.

Cassandra argued back, "There's no time. You can question her when she wakes up." I scowled at her. Leliana appeared behind Cassandra. I hate how silent rogues are and I hate that humans think they can be totally silent. She didn't fool me though. I can hear her heavy breathing a mile away. "Remember why you are here, Solas." Cassandra added.

I couldn't argue with her. The lady was hard headed and nothing could sway her. Why am I here? She thinks she can _save_ me. _Save_ my kind. I'm not a bad blood mage. Quite the contrary. I am a smart blood mage. Not some ravaging, flesh devouring maleficur. It's the stupid ones who put a bad image on the name blood mage and I despise them for it.

I started up the stairs without looking back at her and Leliana. As I reached the top, Varric was standing against the door to the outside. Cassandra doesn't even like Varric. The only reason she kept him around was because he was connected with the Champion of Kirkwall. I didn't mind his company though. He was a fantastic story teller, as are many dwarves, and very friendly to everyone. He knew many things about different people. His information has proved useful to me the several times we have talked. Not that I would take advantage of his gifts.

"Cassandra has ordered us to support the men at the gate," Varric said as I climbed the top step.

"I know," I replied.

"Come on Baldy. It's better than sitting in a dungeon all day studying," Varric joked with me. I hate when he called me Baldy. He gave nicknames to everyone. Mine stuck because how many people can say they have seen a bald elf before?

"I don't sit in a dungeon all day studying," I replied.

"Uh-hu, tell that story to my brother, he might believe you."

I followed him with my staff out. I used it as a walking stick on occasion. I know, how terrible of me. But things can be used for different purposes. Varric's weapon of choice was his crossbow, which he named Bianca. Why a person would name a crossbow seemed silly to me. I have only heard of great swords having names.

We reached the gate and heard fighting on the other side.

"Ready for this Baldy?" Varric asked.

"Open the gate. Let's clean up this mess," I responded.

Varric pushed the gate open. Three of Cassandra's men were left standing against seven demons. One of those demons being a powerful rage demon. I had to act fast. I began casting a shield spell over the men, but one was too far off it wouldn't reach him. I began casting the spell anyways. He would have to fend for himself. Green and blue colors began to flow from my left hand. I muttered the incantation under my breath and released the power for the men. Shields came up but Varric was knocked back by the rage demon's powers before the spell reached him. I quickly stood in front of Varric using my staff to block off the attacks. The men managed to kill the easy demons standing. The rage demon shrieked as its comrades fell. Flames grew from its feet and exploded in the faces of the soldiers. Varric was on his feet now firing special bolts at the demon, but I knew it could not be taken down easily. I began using a blood magic spell to bind it forever to the underworld. I cut my hand open and began muttering the spell. The demon shrieked again as its body was being cut open by my blood. My heart raced as I controlled its life. I closed my hand into a fist and swept it to my side, cutting the demon in half and killing it for good. Varric breathed a sigh of relief as the demon fell, but I was still uneasy. The air grew thin and hazy. A rift was opening in front of us. I braced myself behind my staff to ward off the demon attacks. Varric had Bianca at the ready. Demons poured out. Varric and I fought the first few that came out but more kept coming. We heard a boom and realized it came from behind us. The gate was pushed open by Cassandra and the elf that was asleep in the dungeon. They were fighting the demons. The elf was casting spells with her staff, Cassandra using her sword and shield. Varric let his last arrow thrust into the last demon. I felt a surge. More were coming.

"Quickly, before more come through!" I shouted at the elf. She didn't understand what I was saying. I grabbed the elf's left wrist. Her palm was glowing green, just like the rift in the sky. It was the only thing left that I hadn't tried, but I thrust her hand towards the rift. I felt the connection her hand made with the rift. A stream of light connected her hand to the rift and it closed. It just disappeared. The elf turned to look at me.

"What did you do?" She asked.

"I did nothing. The credit is yours," I explained to the elf.

"I closed that thing? How?" She said as she looked at her palm. She was on the right track to answers.

"Whatever magic opened the breach in the sky also placed that mark upon your hand," I explained. "I realized the mark might be able to close the rifts that have opened in the Breach's wake – and it seems I was correct."

"Meaning it could also close the Breath itself," Cassandra chimed in.

"Possibly," I answered. My theory about her closing them was correct. She _can _close them. I turned to her, "It seems you hold the key to our salvation." She blinked at me, confused. I don't blame her. She seemed like an airhead to me. Head in the clouds, not giving a damn about the world.

"Good to know, here I thought we would be ass-deep in demons forever," Varric joked. She turned to look at him. "Varric Tethras: rogue, storyteller, and occasionally unwelcome tagalong," Varric said, bowing as he introduced himself.

"Varric," the elf said with a smile. "That's a nice crossbow you have there."

Varric smiled, "Isn't she? Bianca and I have been through a lot together."

The elf giggled and said, "You named your crossbow Bianca?"

Glad to know I wasn't the only one thinking that was strange.

"Of course, and she'll be great company in the valley," Varric replied smiling at her.

"ABSOLUTELY NOT," Cassandra said as she walked over to him. She stood tall in front of the dwarf. "Your helps is appreciated Varric, but…"

"Have you been in the valley lately, seeker? Your soldiers aren't in control anymore. You need me," Varric argued back.

Cassandra scoffed and turned away.

Well my turn I guess, "My name is Solas, if there are to be introductions. I am pleased to see you still live…"

"He means, 'I kept that mark from killing you while you slept,'" Varric interrupted me.

She turned from Varric to me, "Then I owe you my thanks."

I smiled, appreciative of her thanks, "Thank me if we manage to close the breach without killing you in the process." There was still much to learn about her and the breach. I vowed to myself right then that I would not let her die. "Cassandra, you should know that the magic involved here is unlink any I have seen. Your prisoner is a mage, but I would find it difficult to imagine any mage having such power."

"Understood," Cassandra replied. "We must get to the forward camp quickly."

"Wait, I am your prisoner no longer. I agreed to help," the elf said to Cassandra. "and…" she turned to me. "I have a name."

I smiled then said, "Alright, let's hear it."

"Shel, my name is Shel."

A fitting name for her somehow.

"Let's move," Cassandra called to us.

I watched as Shel turned to follow Cassandra. Varric nodded his head towards me and I followed after him.

We moved further down into the valley, and with the river frozen over, we used that path to travel faster. And not many rifts intercepted our path.

We finally reached the forward camp that surrounded the breach. It was clearly higher and bigger in the sky than the rifts. Bigger demons were sure to come out of this one.

"How do you expect me to reach that?!" Shel seemed surprised at just how big it was.

"I'm sure hoisting you up on my shoulders could get you closer," Varric joked.

"Ha, yeah, I'm sure I would still be the same height. But thank you for the offer, Varric."

"You can reach it," I said to her. Closing the breach should be just like closing the rifts."

She looked at me and questioned, "How do you know all this?"

I smiled. Just guesses, I should have told her. Just then the rift started erupting. A rage demon was starting to come out.

"We must make our way down to the ground quickly," Cassandra explained.

Shel looked around and saw no easy way down. Then she just hopped down the first wall, landed on the space below, and hopped that wall, landing on the ground. Not bad for a mage elf. Cassandra and I proceeded to follow her as Varric made his way down slowly and carefully.

The breach was at full size now and the rage demon emerged.

"Let us handle the demon, you focus on closing the breach," I told Shel.

She nodded and braced herself to start the closure. The rage demon charged Cassandra and I. She attempted to hold him back with her shield as I cast a barrier spell around us hoping that some of it would reach Shel, but it turned out she had already cast her own barrier spell around herself. She thrust her hand into the sky at the breach and the green light exploded from her hand and connected to the breach. As she started, some of the demons became paralyzed from the closure but the rage demon pressed on. The smaller demons came to their senses and disrupted Shel's attention to the breach. She casted electric spells and armored her body with rock. She seemed very proficient at her spells. I questioned where she might have learned her magic from, but the Dalish probably taught her the most.

As I was getting caught up in my thoughts, the rage demon became angrier. He had Cassandra on her back with her shield held high to hold him off. Varric was shooting the last of his arrows into the demon's skull. I raised a barrier around us once more and began my ritual. I cut open my hand with the thorn in my staff and chanted an ancient blood magic curse on the demon. The demon froze under my control. Varric and Cassandra were giving it all they had. I felt the demon's life-line slowly thin out as Cassandra delivered the final blow to the rage demon.

I glanced at Shel as the rage demon fell. She had not closed the breach yet. There were too many on her and she was growing weak of mana.

"Aid the elf! She must close the breach!" Cassandra commanded.

I cast my barrier spell on her. She instantly felt the barrier rise and ran back from the demons with enough distance left to still connect with the breach. Cassandra and Varric were in front of her fighting off the demons. She raised her hand to the breach. The green light exploded out of her hand once more. More demons continued to come out. I concentrated on keeping the barrier up around her, but I was at a loss of one for myself.

As I tried to make my way closer to her, demons crossed in my path. I sent spells flying at them with my staff. There were too many of them coming between us. I lost concentration. My barrier shield around her broke as a demon struck me from behind. I turned to repel it but as I faced it, the demons behind me had jumped on my back. I was surrounded. Demons were clawing my face and body. I caught a glimpse of Shel's face. She looked at me and then at the breach. She strained herself to close it. I saw the green explosion from the breach get sucked into a black hole in the sky and the demons vanished from on top of me.

Suddenly, we were all encompassed in a vision.

_Divine Justinia was floating in mid-air, a demon controlling her. The doors burst open and Shel ran into the room._

_"__What is going on here?" Shel demanded. _

_"Run, get out of here! Save yourself!" Justinia commanded to Shel. _

_The demon became angry and unleashed its energy. Shel shielded herself with her hand which absorbed the blast, creating the mark that closed the rifts. _

So now we know she didn't kill The Divine and she was given the mark by this demon.

Shel was running towards me. I felt a bit woozy. Not too many cuts, but enough to be losing blood. I instantly felt the last bit of her mana surround my body as she cast a healing spell to stop me from bleeding out. She quickly pulled out an elfroot bottle and applied the potion to my cuts. I felt better instantly.

"I feel much better, thank you," I said to her.

She looked at me and smiled. "You're welcome."

"You did it Shel. You closed the breach," Cassandra said as she joined us.

Shel glanced up at the sky. The grey clouds had departed and the evening sun shown over the mountains. She did it. This mage elf. She closed the breach with her hand. I knew that my time with her was not finished. My journeys could wait, and who knows, my travels with her could lead to my greatest journey.


	2. Learning

Chapter 2: Learning

Two weeks have passed since that first day I met Shel. She has taken me with her on every expedition. She has such a heart. There are an infinite amount of people here in the Hinterlands, and she has a heart to help every one of them. I take back my feelings of her being the enemy. Cassandra invoked the Inquisition to begin and she jumped at the opportunity to help. Could she somehow feel indebted to Cassandra? And yet, here she is, helping a farmer fend off wolves. Don't get me wrong, it's a nice gesture, "Don't we have more important things to do?"

"Like what? Closing rifts and slaying demons?" Shel asked as she balanced herself like an acrobat on the cobblestone ledge.

"Yes, that," I said.

"Solas, on your journeys, did you ever do anything else other than why you were journeying? Ever stop to assist a wounded or help a farmer farm his crops?"

"No, those types of people are not significant. They are not worth knowing."

"Yes, but aren't they worth sharing knowledge with? I thought you were a fountain full of knowledge," She said jokingly. I rolled my eyes at her. "Let me ask you this. Where does knowledge come from?"

Was she asking because she doesn't know the answer to that question? "From experience, of course," Varric chimed in.

"Exactly!" Shel got excited and pointed her finger at Varric. "Don't you think that the wounded man and farmer have experiences they could share with you to increase your knowledge?"

"Knowledge isn't everything…" I said defensively. She was always doing this. Tugging at my strings, trying to get me to see a different picture. I liked the picture I saw before I met her. I stole a glance at her and she frowned at me.

Shel jumped down from the ledge she was balancing on and looked at me seriously. "I know how important closing the rifts are, but I also know that having others' support is just as important. We cannot fight this demonic battle on our own."

Of course she was smart, which is why Cassandra nominated her as the Inquisitor. And she took the job! "I see your point, Inquisitor. Please forgive my rudeness."

"You're forgiven," She said and we continued our search for the possessed wolves.

We continued on through the Hinterlands barely speaking to each other. I felt left out of our group. Varric told several tales about his travels with Hawke, the Champion of Kirkwall and the battle between the mages and Templars. Shel obviously had not known how bad it was in Kirkwall being blinded by her Dalish tribe. Shel would often talk about the members in her clan. She was an only child, whose parents vanished one night. She was very close to her keeper being the first in the clan. She could have taken over the keeper's position when she passed. I wondered what had brought her to the Divine and how she came to be there.

Things changed when we returned to Haven. Cassandra was kind enough to provide me my own living quarter which I knew would be secure when I went into The Fade. The first night we returned I entered into my dreamland.

As I closed my eyes, the world suddenly came into view. Nothing is for certain in The Fade, but you can see things that you aren't able to see in reality. This world was of the camp in the Hinterlands. No, dream! Why are you taking me back there? My dream wouldn't change. Cassandra and Varric were arguing about a story he had just told about Hawke. And there Shel sat, ignoring their quarrel. Her slender body illuminated the sun's glow off her skin. I saw her curled hair sway when the wind swept past her. She gazed into the valley below. I stepped behind her and she felt my presence.

"Isn't this valley beautiful? Except for the rifts of course," she said. I could hear her smile in her words. "I closed the breach temporarily it seems, but what happens now? Will the land go back to the way it used to be?" She took her time to appreciate the land, and I respected that. How did she feel about what I was doing? How would she feel about talking to spirits? I wasn't ready to share that side of me with her.

"I want things to go back to the way they used to be before the rifts," she said as she turned to look at me.

I do too – I wanted to say. But if things were back to the way they were, I would have never met you.

"Solas?" I heard her voice calling me but my dream had gone blank. I heard several knocks and her calling me again. "Solas?"

My eyes flashed open. I heard the knock for real this time.

"Solas?"

I sat up in my bed, still clothed, thankfully. I heard the knock again. This time no call, but footsteps leaving my doorway. I jumped to my feet and opened the door.

Shel spun around. She was two steps from leaving.

"I'm sorry, I didn't think you were busy," she starteds.

"I'm not," I replied. "I was…sleeping." Dreaming in the Fade, you mean?

"Oh! Having a good dream I hope."

About you…yes.

"I'm sorry I woke you. I will come back later," Shel said.

"No, it's fine. What can I do for you Inquisitor?"

"Well, I know we had some different viewpoints in the Hinterlands and I wanted to get to know you better. You seemed a bit out of the group when we were traveling…"

So she did notice. "Was I that obvious?" I joked with her.

She smiled and let out a small laugh. "Well, like I said, I wanted to get to know you better. I wasn't sure if the way you acted in our travels was your true self, or if you were going through some things."

"What makes you interested in me?"

"You're an apostate, yet you risked your fate to help the inquisition," she said.

"I'm sorry, I have so much fear in me. What would you know of me?"

"Tell me about the elves," she said.

I smiled at her request. "Actually, I would like to know what you think about them. You are Dalish are you not?"

"What's wrong with being Dalish?"

"Dalish are story tellers who will never see the beyond their forests. While they pass on stories, mangling details, I walk The Fade. I have seen things they have not." I let fade walking slip so naturally, and her expression did not change.

"What made you study the fade?" she asked.

"I grew up in a village in the north with not much to interest a young boy, I treasured my dreams. Being awake, out of the fade became troublesome. I have journeyed deep into the fade to study ruins from ancient battlefields."

"Have spirits ever tempted you?"

"I have learned to control my dreams with full consciousness," I said. Except for the dream from last night with you in it. I could not stop that dream from occurring…

"You study ruins from battle fields in the fade?"

"You ask a lot of questions, you know that? I can find memories no other living being has ever seen. The more interesting the dream, the more interesting the dreamer."

"I've never heard of someone going so far into the fade," she said.

I studied her. Did I say something to offend her? It seemed her mood suddenly changed. "I will stay with you to help, at least until the breach has been closed."

"You have an interesting way of looking at the world, Solas," she said. "Thank you."

Ever since that conversation, she continued to take me out on expeditions. The entire down time we had walking through forests, she would fill it with questions for me. She asked me about the elves, ancient magic, and how I knew so much about the fade. She didn't mind the blood magic either. In fact, she had the same views about blood magic as I did, that it was just another form of magic and the mages who slandered it corrupted it for others. Her questions never ceased and neither did her smile when she gained new knowledge.

She also shared her life with me. One day we were walking through a valley and she asked me if I had ever traveled with anyone. The question came as a surprise to me, as I had never thought of traveling with anyone except those we were with currently. She was the first person I had traveled with.

"No."

"You've never traveled with anyone on your adventures?" she asked me again, as if I might change my answer to her question.

I shook my head.

"My friend Teyler and I used to hunt all the time back in the clan. And when the keeper would send out special requests, we would be the first to jump on them. We had each other's backs when we were out. He was someone I could trust to keep watch for me when we had overnight excursions."

"Sounds like you two spent a lot of time together," I said.

She blushed immediately. "Our relationship wasn't like _that_. He was my brother – well not by blood – but we were born the same year and grew up together."

"Tell me about your parents," I said changing the subject.

"They were the most beautiful elves in our clan," she started with a smile. "They always openly showed their affections for each other, but the clan keeper did not approve of their actions. They would leave sometimes at night. I wasn't sure where they would go, but several years ago, they left during the night and never returned. So I was living in the clan but after they left, I felt like an outsider. Teyler ignored me. But the keeper made me her first and began teaching me about magic."

Now seemed like an appropriate time to question her. "Do you remember what happened? Why you left your clan?"

We were walking slower than Cassandra and Varric now. "I'm sorry, I can't remember much before the attack."

"Well, you are the first person to accompany me, or should I rephrase that, for it is I accompanying you."

She smiled at that. "I hope on your next journey, you would consider me a suitable companion," she said turning away from me. I could imagine her cheeks blushing. Mine were. The fact that she would say that…does that mean, she wants to stay with me after the Inquisition is finished?

I smiled. Luckily Cassandra and Varric were not within ear-shot for what I was about to say. "I would consider it a delight if you would accompany me in my future travels."

She turned around to me and smiled. She grabbed hold of my arm and looked at me with her stunning blue eyes. "Thank you." She anchored me to the ground right there. I was caught in her grasp. What was she doing to me?

She released my arm and I lost my anchor. I had to step forward to keep my balance. I cradled her arm in mine to save myself. Her hand found its way up to my chest. She looked up at me waiting for what would happen next. I caught my staff in the crook of my arm as I took her face in my hand. My fingertips brushing along the bottom of her ears.

Our moment was interrupted by the sound of Cassandra laughing at a story Varric was telling. Shel blinked at me and retracted her hand into a light fist. We stepped away from each other and continued our trek in silence. I had to catch my chest to make sure my heart was still beating inside my body. How could just her touch do this to my body?

We reached the Inquisition camp as a soldier came with news that Shel was needed back in Haven. We restocked our supplies and headed for Haven.


	3. Foresight

Chapter 3: Foresight

I was reading in the Chantry library, waiting for Shel to come out of the war room. She was in there with the Inquisition council discussing whether we should acquire the aid of the Templars or the mages. The mage, Dorian, had barged into this meeting to spill his advice. I could hear Cassandra's voice stressing the Inquisition seek the aid of the Templars. The softer voice sounded like Shel's. She was speaking too softly for me to hear.

Just then the door opened and Shel walked out. The door closed behind her. She saw me sitting in the side hallway and came over to me.

"Sounded heavy for a decision you are supposed to make," I said.

"The council is divided to which side we should take."

"Who do you want to side with?"

The council door opened and the rest of the members spilled out. They exited the chantry without a word to each other.

She let out a sigh pressing her back against the pillar. "If we side with the Templars, they would give us brute strength against the breach. Siding with the mages gives us more power against the demons."

"I think you already know which side you want to take."

She looked down at me and nodded. "I think you're right." We smiled at each other, then she asked me, "What are you reading?"

I closed the book to show her the cover. "Varric's tale, _Hard in Hightown,_ about his travels with the Champion of Kirkwall."

Shel's smile grew wider. "That doesn't seem like the thing you would normally read."

"Well I don't normally get the opportunity to hear stories from friends. This one is quite entertaining." I handed the book to her. "Here, read it during your spare time."

"Thank you, Solas."

"Well Inquisitor, shall we prepare for negotiations?"

She paused and did not reply to me.

"Still feels weird…" Shel started.

I turned my head in confusion.

She titled her head towards me, "being called Inquisitor, I mean. What are titles worth today? Am I fit to lead this Inquisition?"

"Title or no title, you are very wise. I've seen you grow in knowledge and strength these last few weeks. You have influenced so many people's lives." She did not say anything to me, but looked away, out the Chantry's windows. I stood up next to her. "Think of all the people you have saved already, here in Haven, when you shut that breach."

"But it's still open -"

"Yes, but closing it temporarily, preventing more demons from coming out saved lives. Now it has become manageable for the soldiers here to control. We need support to close the breach for good." Without consciously doing so, I was holding her arm, willing her to see the amazing things she had already done. But I could tell from her face that it wasn't enough. She needed to save more. I let her go after realizing what I had done.

"Thank you, Solas," she said touching my hand as I put it down. "I think it's time we seek out those mages."

I picked up my staff from where it leaned on the Chantry wall. We gathered Dorian and Cassandra and headed for Redcliff Castle.

"Alright, here is where I leave you," Dorian announced before reaching the gate.

"You're leaving?" I questioned. I did not think it was a good idea to let a Tevinter mage go off by himself even though Shel insisted he was different.

"I can't be seen with you all. It would give away our plan."

"The plan was to sneak into the castle and take out the Magister," I replied.

Dorian opened his mouth to say something but was cut off.

"The plan has changed," Shel interrupted. She turned to me, "I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner. I knew you would never let me do this if you had known."

What was she talking about? Was I the only one who didn't know?

"I'm going through the gate to distract the Magister. He is strong and powerful. The only attack that would work would be a surprise attack on him from behind to lower his defenses," she said.

"You mean, you're playing as bait?" I said angrily.

"I knew you wouldn't agree with the plan…"

"No, I will not stand by and watch him take you out. This is madness, Shel. You cannot expect to walk away from this."

"Then help me fight."

We entered the room and were ordered to leave Shel's side. She sweet talked the guard and let us all pass with her. Felix, the magister's son who was helping us, was standing by his father's side as we were greeted.

Shel began negotiations with the magister which went poorly from the beginning. She tried negotiating with the Olesian authority. Really? No better excuse?

Then Felix had to open his big mouth telling his father that Shel knew the plan.

"You're son is concerned that you are into something terrible," she pleaded.

"You know nothing. You walk in here with a mark on your hand that you don't even understand and you think you're in charge?" The magister said as he stood up. "You're nothing but a mistake."

That's it. I was going to tear him limb from limb, but Shel shot me a glance to hold back. So I grudgingly obeyed.

"Tell me what this mark on my hand is for."

"You can't even begin to understand," the Magister said.

"Father listen to yourself!" Felix pleaded.

Dorian stepped in. The conversation got out of hand the minuet the magister mentioned working for the elder one. The elder one made a promise to the magister to save his son. The elder one demanded the life of the Inquisitor.

"You are a mistake. You should have never existed," The Magister said again as he conjured a spell in his hand.

It was Dorian who reacted so quickly. He threw a spell at the magister to throw off his magic and opened a rift and she was gone. She vanished before my eyes with Dorian through the green rift that the Magister opened up. We all took a moment to look around at each other. Cassandra and I caught glances and knew we were to charge the Magister. I grabbed my staff, a spell at the ready when the rift opened again. Shel and Dorian appeared before us again.

The Magister failed. He apologized to his son.

Dorian presumed our battle over, but the door burst open with soldiers lining the hall. King Alistair and his queen marched up to the first enchanter and demanded she leave for her abuse of resources.

Shel, the kind heart she has, offered an alliance with the mages. The mages agreed to help close the breach.

Shel exhaled, letting out a long breath. Looking closer I saw red dust specks on her vest. She was wet from head to toe. Dorian as well. What had happened when the vanished? She looked exhausted but kept her composure until we started heading back to Haven. She walked slowly with Dorian discussing their new alliance and questioning him about his travels.

The sun went down before we even got out of the Hinterlands. Shel was exhausted and was slowly losing her momentum. Cassandra suggested we stopped at the west camp for the night before continuing.

Cassandra prepared a fire, but found her conversation was with Dorian, questioning his background, and discovering what kind of mage he was.

Shel did not care much for the fire. Instead I caught her staring at me with a solemn face.

"Whatever you're thinking about right now can't be good. Come. Let's talk," I said standing. I held my hand out for her to pull her up. She reached for me and as I grasped her hand, I felt her electricity flow through my blood. She was shaking, not able to fully come to reality.

As we walked behind a tent, I spotted a tree overlooking the mountain side where we could sit and not be bothered.

"Here, sit down."

She sat and took a moment of silence to herself before she began talking to me. "Solas, in the fade, do you ever see the future?"

I shook my head. "The fade is a place of memories, not for foretellings."

"What if you saw the future? And were terrified at what you saw?"

What did she mean? Did she – "you time traveled didn't you? That rift the Magister created sent you into the future."

She nodded.

I waited for her to say something. Then she spoke so softly.

"I saw you die, Solas. You, Cassandra, and Leliana. You all died. You were infected with red lyrium. And you died defending me."

"Shel, this is the present. You came back. We are all safe," I said to her.

"But what if we failed? And I was stuck in that time? Rifts covering the world? Red lyrium infecting buildings and people. I don't know what I would have done."

"Don't dwell on the 'what ifs'. It's not good for your mind."

"Then why can't I think of anything else? These images just keep replaying in my head. Dorian and I had vanished and everyone thought we had died. Except for you. When we found you in that cell you were so relieved to see us. Like a second hadn't passed. But you were covered in red lyrium, facing death."

I stayed silent, not sure what to say to that.

"I caught a glimpse of the future, of what Thedas will come to be, if we do not close this breach and I do not want that future," she said.

"Shel, be ready. You have now angered this Elder One twice. We must defeat him if you do not want that future to come to pass and I do not think he will ignore this."

She paused, absorbing what I had said. "You're right. I need to be prepared for what happens next. Thank you for the conversation, Solas. You have brought me back to my right mind."

"You're welcome. And if there's anything else you need…?"

"Just some rest," she said as she stood up. "I'll see you in the morning."

I watched as she retreated to a tent.

She did need to be prepared, not worrying about the future. That future she saw, I will not allow it to come true.


	4. The Elder One

Chapter 4: The Elder One

Shel felt it was time to return to the breach to try to close it once more. With the mages attending, we were sure to close it.

She thrust her hand up towards the breach. The mages focused their power towards her and she finally closed it. Cassandrapushed past the crowd to make sure she was still alive.

"You did it," Cassandra said to her smiling. That was the first time I saw her with a smile on her face.

That night, parties broke out all around Haven. The villagers were drinking and dancing to music.

I stayed outside, listening to the sky. If the breach hadn't closed I would hear it. But I heard nothing. The sky had not been silent in a while, it surprised me.

"Solas."

I turned and saw Cassandra approaching.

"I have confirmed the breach is closed. Our sky is silent," I informed her.

She nodded at me. "Thank you. You have been a great support to this Inquisition. Your duties have been fulfilled. Here. As promised."

She handed me a scroll.

"Your right to freedom. Let you be captured by Templars no longer," Cassandra said.

I nodded in curtesy and she returned the nod. With that she turned around to leave.

"Cassandra," I called after her. She turned as I called to her. "Please give my regards to the Inquisitor." Better to leave her now before feelings got in the way. She nodded again and turned and left. With that I sifted through my pack. I still needed to restock on some supplies before I headed out. I prayed I did not run into Shel in the village.

I opened the door to the potion master. He was ordering around his servant like he always did. He saw me and greeted me kindly.

"Ah, Master Solas! What can I do you for?"

"I just need a resupply then I will be on my way," I said to him, handing him a list of the things I needed.

"Ah," the potion master said as he glanced at its contents. "This request is for more than the usual…You're leaving aren't you?"

I nodded. He disappeared into his supply room leaving me with his servant. I studied the servant and noticed that he had a Dalish tattoo, but didn't look elven. I began to question him when I heard the warning bells sound outside. I peered out the window and saw demon troops advancing down the mountain.

No time to think. I ran out of the store towards the Chantry. I couldn't be too far behind Shel and her group. I came out of the buildings to find Shel running down the steps with Cassandra, Dorian, and Varric. I fell in line with the group, taking my place behind Shel to protect her with my barrier. We met Commander Cullen at the gate. He was explaining the situation to the council.

We heard a pounding at the gate.

"I can't help you unless you open this gate!" We heard someone shot from the other side.

Shel opened the gate and saw a young man in a broad hat slaying a soldier.

"My name is Cole and I have come to warn you," he began. He was a spirit. I could tell instantly that he meant no harm to us. "He has come to kill you."

"Who?" Shel questioned.

"The Elder One," Cole said as he pointed to the top of the mountain where The Elder One Stood.

Shel's eyes widened with fear.

"Cullen, give me a plan! Anything!"

"Haven is no fortress, we must fight for her. We can give the troops everything we've got with our catapults. Get to them and aim them at the armies," the commander quickly explained.

Shel nodded. "Solas, Dorian, and Cassandra, with me. The rest of you get the villagers to safety."

It seemed my journeys with her did not end here like I had originally planned. I followed her to the first catapult. It was overrun with Templars infected by red lyrium. We held back the forces at the first catapult. After we cleared the area it started firing but the other one was not firing. We made our way to the second one.

"I need you to hold off the forces as long as possible so I can turn the catapult to fire," Shel instructed us.

She fired it and created an avalanche on the mountain covering the demon army. The soldier around her rejoiced but a dragon survived. We made our way back to the gates. Commander Cullen was ushering us in.

"We need to get everyone back to the Chantry. It is the only thing that could protect us against that beast!" He commanded.

Shel made stops along the way to rescue some of the townspeople who were overrun by the troops. But we made it to the Chantry in one piece.

Cullen came to Shel to report.

"That dragon is cutting a path for that army. They are headed straight for us."

"You. The Elder One is coming for you," Cole chimed in as he helped a man into the Chantry.

"How do I stop him?"

"It won't be easy, he has a dragon," Cole said.

"Of course he has a – Look, the only thing that slowed them was the avalanche. We could use that catapult to create another avalanche," Cullen said.

"And bury the city in snow?!" Shel argued.

"Wait, this man says there is a way out so the people can escape," Cole said, translating the mans last thoughts before he passed.

"Cullen, can you get them out?" Shel asked.

No, that would mean sacrificing yourself for these people.

"Yes, it could work, but what of your escape?"

Shel shook her head, unsure of the result. "We have no other choice."

"Ok, keep The Elder One distracted until we have reached the treeline, then take him out. Maker go with you," Cullen said before he rushed to the back of the Chantry with the rest of the townspeople.

Shel began tightening her armor.

"This is a terrible plan, you will die before you even see The Elder One. Please, don't do this," I pleaded with her.

"Well I don't plan on losing. Fight with me Solas. Help restore this world to what it was before the breach," she said. She was focused, poised, and ready for battle. I was ready to leave her hours ago, but that plan went out the door. She needed my help and I would not leave her side.

"I follow you, Inquisitor."

"Let's go."

The moment we reopened the doors, we were bombarded with soldiers. I cast the barrier spell around Shel, Cassandra, Dorian, and I. Shel began casting her sparks and electrifying attacks. Dorian using blood magic to possess his opponent and controlling him to fight for us. Cassandra ready with her sword and shield, pushing back the enemies and making room for us to cast. We finally broke through and headed for the catapult.

"Aim it as quickly as possible! We'll hold them off," I said to Shel.

She ran to the aiming post and started turning the wheel. I cast a barrier over her and turned around to fend off the enemy, casting spells in one hand and sending fire from my staff in the other hand.

"Almost there…" Shel called.

She had the catapult in place as the dragon circled overhead.

"Move now!" She screamed as the dragon swooped down, its wings knocked me back from her.

Suddenly we were thrown further back by a blast. The Elder one had broken through. Shel was on the ground in front of him. His dragon circled around her. I was helpless to do anything.

"We must go Solas! We will return for her I promise! She must defeat The Elder One. Have faith in her," Cassandra said, pulling me away from the scene.

I stumbled after her, glancing back at Shel every chance I had. The Elder One had his fist around her neck picking her up like she was a doll. _I don't plan on losing. Fight with me Solas._ Her words rolled in my mind as I watched her being thrown on the catapult's steps.

Cassandra pulled me along, but I turned around one last time. I saw her cut the catapult while The Elder One was distracted with her words. The catapult released on the mountain behind her and snow fell to the ground, covering The Elder One, his dragon, and Shel. And for the first time in my life, I prayed to the maker that she was still alive.


	5. Skyhold

Chapter 5: Skyhold

The cold air made me miserable. The wind howled and the icy snow blew hard. The villagers who had escaped were setting up camp for the night. Cassandra left with Cullen and a group of soldiers to search for Shel. This was the fifth search party since we had been here. It had been two days already and still no sign of her.

"Don't worry about her Baldy, she survived. You'll see," Varric came to cheer me up. "I knew about your plans to leave after the breach was closed, so I must say I am a bit surprised to see you still here."

"That's right, I had plans to leave, but this whole thing started just as I was restocking my supplies. I had no choice to stay after I got trapped here," I replied. An obvious lie to the dwarf. I'm sure all of Thedas could sense my feelings for her by now. I stayed because of her. To fight with her and believe in her.

"Denying it doesn't help," Varric said as he walked back to the villagers.

An hour or so had passed when I heard shouts coming from over the mountain ridge.

"She's here! She's alive!" someone was shouting.

I could barely stand as a wave of relief rushed over me, taking me by surprise. My heart jumped in my chest seeing her being carried in by Cullen and Cassandra. They rushed her to a cot and waved me in to aid her.

"Solas, she's barley alive, almost frozen to death. She fell unconscious when she saw us," Cassandra said to me.

I took in what she said and laid my staff down. I released my mana over her body to assess her vitals. Heartbeat, weak. Breathing, minimal. She was shivering violently. I glanced at her hand. Shit, her fingertips were turning blue.

"Cassandra, bring lots of blankets and put up a tent to shield this wind," I instructed. Cassandra nodded and went searching for blankets.

"Will she be alright Solas?" Cullen asked.

"She will live," I said still concentrating my mana over her body. I let some flames run through my mana to keep her warm, but I could not keep this up for long.

Cassandra's men were throwing a tarp over the area, enclosing the space around Shel's cot. Cullen stepped out of the way, leaving me and Shel together. I took my time to study her more closely. Her face and forearms had light bruises. She must have fallen into something. Her hair was dusted with snowflakes. The area around us became warm with the tent up and I felt her shivering slow down. I dropped my mana. Her body looked frozen. She needed to warm up fast.

Cassandra threw aside some fabric and entered the tent with a bundle of blankets.

"Cassandra, I need you to warm her up," I said.

"I've brought blankets…I could go find some hot water to-"

"Not that kind of warmth. Her body temperature has dropped too low. She needs body contact to bring her back up to the normal temperature."

Cassandra nodded. She began undoing her own armor. I exited the tent with my staff and released a long breath. The villagers had gathered around outside, curious as to the Inquisitor's health. Commander Cullen approached me first with his questions. I held up a hand to silence his questions.

"Cassandra is caring for her now. We should check on them in the morning," I said.

Cullen nodded and left me alone. I found my way to the outskirts of the camp and fell to asleep on an empty cot, drifting off into the fade.

My world spun into view. I was standing there next to Corypheus, The Elder One. He was going to grab Shel. I froze this moment in time. I walked behind Shel to get a better view of our enemy. He was a giant compared to Shel, towering over her. Flames erupting from his body. In his left hand he held an ancient elven aorb. I got a closer look. It was the same orb I had been searching for. It had been a while since I had seen it. I needed it back to search for the Eluvian. The Dread Wolf had given it to him, like an idiot.

"So you noticed it…" a familiar voice spoke to me.

"Fen'Harel! I need it back," I shouted to the spirit. "The Herald failed to kill Corypheus. He still has it in its possession."

"If you must! Find it again in the world, you will. Then we will have it!" he said to me.

I looked at him. His wolf shape shaky in the fade. "What if I have a change of mind for the orb's uses?"

"What?" Fen'Harel questioned me.

"This world, I do not want its future to come to pass. Bringing back the Old Gods would change history, the way we live, I do not want people to be infected with red lyrium and rifts everywhere."

"What are you saying Solas? Are you betraying me?" the spirit became enraged. "You failed to fight with this Inquisitor to retrieve your precious orb on purpose?"

"No it wasn't on purpose! Corypheus had a dragon with him!" I argued. "In fact, I had planned to leave that day to steal it back from him, but he came to me. I had to improvise!"

"Oh, so if you got it, what would you do with it then? Because you sure have not shared this plan with me," Fen'Harel inquired.

"Return it to the elven clans, so that they may keep it safe, so that no one uses that power."

"HA! HAHAHAHAHA! Have you lost your mind Solas?! Where are you? Who are you? Nice trick. Why don't you call me when the _real_ Solas wants to talk?" Fen'Harel chuckled. "Look at you! Look. At. You."

Fen'Harel jumped on me, pushing me down on my back.

"Your heart has grown soft," he said glaring at me. _No, not her. Don't take Shel_. "Take her?!

I'm not going to take her. No, you are going to use her to get to Corypheus. And if you don't find him, I'm sure he'll eventually come to you. And when he comes again, you must retrieve the orb or I will see that she breathes her last breath," he breathed down my neck. "Remember who you are."

_Solas?_

"Wake up Solas."

My eyes flew open. Cassandra was shaking me awake.

"Cassandra," I started.

"She's awake. Sorry for waking you. Just thought you would want to know," she said.

"No apology necessary. Thank you for telling me," I said.

She nodded and took her leave. I pushed myself up in the cot. The sun was shining just over the horizon. I paused to remember my dream in The Fade. Fen'Harel did not make threats lightly and I did not want her getting hurt. I thought about what the Inquisition would do now. I looked up and saw Cassandra talking with Cullen and Josephine. Probably discussing their next plan. I got up to see what they were thinking.

"We could go back and salvage for parts or survivors…" Cullen mentioned.

"Solas," Josephine called. "Please, we are looking for insight for a new plan."

I considered it for a moment and opened my mouth but got interrupted.

"First question, should be on everyone's mind, is what to do with the villagers?" Shel called as she climbed up the hill.

I put my hand out for her to grab and pull her up faster. She grabbed on and I pulled her up to the group. She gave my hand a small squeeze and I released.

"We need a place big enough to fit the entire Inquisition. The Elder One survived and will come for us again. Anyone have any ideas? Or know the area around here?" Shel asked.

"Inquisitor, are you well enough to be out here?" Cullen asked.

"I'm fine. It's not like I broke any bones," Shel said smiling and holding her ribs at the same time.

I leaned forward on my staff and smiled at her. She knew her body limit. I wish she would just rest some times.

"As to your request, I must review my map as to where exactly we are and determine if there is a stronghold nearby," Josephine said.

"Check your maps, then get back to me. For now, let's make sure these villagers stay warm and that we have enough supplies to get by for now," Shel instructed.

Cullen nodded to Cassandra. They would see to the villagers. Who knows how long Josephine could be looking through her maps.

"A word?" I said to Shel.

I lit a flame in the lantern so she might feel some warmth.

"The humans have not raised one of our people so high for ages beyond counting. Her faith is hard-won, Lethallin, worthy of pride…save one detail. The threat Corypheus wields? The orb he carried? It is ours. Corypheus used the orb to open the Breach. Unlocking it must have caused the explosion that destroyed the conclave. We must find out how he survived…and we must prepare for their reaction, when they learn the orb is of our people."

"Alright," Shel said. "What is it, and how do you know about it?"

"Such things were foci, said to channel power from our gods. Some were dedicated to specific members of our pantheon. All that remain are references in ruins, and faint visions of memory in the fade, echoes of a dead empire.

But however Corypheus came to it, the orb _is elven_, and with it, he threatens the heart of human faith."

"You see what trust I have with the people," Shel said.

I sighed, "faith tends to make martyrs of its champions. I…do not want you to be a martyr. Whatever the case, that trust cannot grow in the wilderness. You will need every advantage. By attacking the Inquisition, Corypheus has changed it. Changed _you_."

"Solas…" she started.

"Scout to the north. Be their guide," I interrupted her. "There is a place that waits for a force to hold it. There is a place where the Inquisition can build…grow…Skyhold."

She looked quizzically at me. "Wait, wait, wait. You mean to say there just happens to be an abandoned hold nearby that could house all these people?"

"Yes…"

"How would you know about it?" she asked.

"I have traveled this area in the Fade," I said. "Remember me telling you that I studied ancient ruins? Well, Skyhold was one of the ruins I studied."

"I appreciate your guidance," she said. "I was told I have you to thank for saving me."

"I just provided a diagnosis and a plan. Cassandra saved you with her body heat."

"Solas, you are always so humble," she said coming closer to me.

"Humble?" I chuckled a bit at hearing _her_ say that. "My humbleness is nothing, compared to yours."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You saved hundreds of lives, including mine, putting your own life in danger for them. I have saved only one life," a very important life to me. A life worth thousands more. "You are far more humble than I." The life I saved was for selfish reasons. I could not stand to hear her call me humble.

"I guess I forgot to mention how stubborn you are at times too," she said smiling.

"Come find me when we settle in at Skyhold. We can talk anytime," I said.

She nodded her head and I walked her back to camp. She got the Inquisition council together to tell them her new plan. I approached Varric and Dorian and informed them of the new plan. We started approaching the villagers and helped everyone pack up.

The sun was at its highest in the sky before we left. My prediction was that we would make it to Skyhold by this time tomorrow.

Shel walked beside me in the beginning of the trek. Eventually she started climbing high up on the rocks to see if she could catch a glimpse. I told her she would know it when she saw it.

Night came sooner than expected. The villagers were tired from the long walk and needed rest. Our group and the council would take turns for the night watch. I was placed on the first watch with Dorian, Cullen, and Josephine. Shel, Leliana, Varric, and Cassandra were taking the second night watch. Things were pretty quiet during our watch. We each took a corner of the camp for watch.

I ventured up a rock to see if I could see anything down the mountain. The lights that would have lit up Haven would have been visible from here. No lights shined tonight after Shel buried the place in snow. I sat in the snow closing my eyes and inhaling the cold breeze. Silence filled my mind putting my body at peace. My fingertips brushed the top of the snow. I glanced back at the camp to make sure all was quiet before I let myself succumb to nature.

I must have stayed in that trance for hours when I heard footsteps in the snow behind me. I didn't open my eyes until I felt a hand on my shoulder. I raised my head and slowly opened my eyes, coming out of my meditative state.

"Lethallin, it must be time for your watch."

Shel draped a blanket over my shoulders as she clutched the blanket that was around her as she sat down beside me in the snow.

"Thank you," I said looking to her.

"You should get some rest," she said.

I smiled ignoring what she said. I was well-rested from my meditation and energized by her presence. "It is you who should be resting. You were frozen just the other night."

"Resting? I couldn't sleep a wink! I am too excited. We are moving to our new home and we are almost there. I want to see it so badly."

I could grant her wish but was it too soon? "If you want to see it that badly, I can show you," I said.

"In the fade you mean?" she asked. She considered that.

"You don't have to. I don't want you to feel uncomfortable. It was just a suggestion," I said.

"No, please show me."

"Don't worry, you will be with me the entire time," I said placing my hand behind her head to lay her down. "Fall asleep and when you wake up, I will be with you in the fade."

She nodded and closed her eyes. I did not move from my position so that my body would continue to shield her reality. I closed my eyes and found her immediately in the dream world.

"Here we are," I said to her.

She placed her arms at her sides to keep her balance. The first couple times in the fade I lost equilibrium so I understood her movements. I grabbed her hand to stabilize her.

"This way," I said. We woke up at the same place where we fell asleep so not to confuse her. He hiked quickly over several mountains and Skyhold came into view.

She gasped at the sight of it. It was breathtaking from this view.

"Tarasyl'an Te'las," I began to say to her.

"Where the sky is held back. Such a fitting name for it."

I smiled at her words. "Skyhold was built on the old elven rituals during the height of their civilization here. Many have inhabited it since. Last I checked, it was vacated."

"Solas, it's perfect. Thank you," she said to me. I looked at her, squeezing her hand.

I brought us out of the fade. My body on top of hers. I looked down at her as she gazed up at me. I saw tears come to her eyes and got up immediately.

"I apologize. Did I do something-"

"Solas," she said covering her face. "Why were you leaving, the day Corypheus attacked. I know you were packing your things. But you weren't even going to say good bye to me."

She took me by complete surprise. I sat back on my heels in front of her. What should I say to her? "I'm sorry. I had…plans…after closing the breach. Thing would have been a lot different if Corypheus hadn't attacked that day." She wouldn't be involved in this mess anymore if he hadn't come the day I planned to leave. "I didn't want to say good bye because I don't think I could have left if I saw you again. You would have asked me to stay, and I…I would do anything…for you."

She peeked her eyes out from behind her hands.

"Inquisitor," I started.

"Maker, please stop calling me that. I thought you and I were past titles," she pleaded. "Solas, I wish you would explain your actions sometimes. Like, if you had explained why you wanted to leave to me earlier, I would have let you be on your way…and if you still want to leave, tell me."

"Shel, I don't want to leave you."

"I don't want you to leave me."

I leaned forward and cradled her head in my hand and brought her close to me and embraced her. "I vow to protect you, fight for you, and always stand by your side for now on."

I felt her breathe a sigh of relief into my chest.

A twig snapped and my heart jumped. I grabbed my staff and pointed it at our visitor.

"Woah Baldy, just letting you two know that the villagers are almost ready to move out," Varric said holding his hands up.

"I'm sorry Varric. You just sneaked up on me, that's all…" I said lowering my staff.

Varric nodded and turned around to head back to the villagers.

"Let's go home," Shel said as she walked past me.

I smiled and followed after her. She had great memory for she leaded the rest of the way there. We reached Skyhold just after mid-day as I had predicted. The hold was glorious when we came upon it. We ushered the villagers inside and got settled in our new home.


	6. Two in the Fade

Chapter 6: Two in the Fade

The main hall in Skyhold was trashed. Broken pieces of glass were scattered on the floor. Brick had been torn out of the walls and the wooden beams holding the infrastructure were broken.

"This place is a mess," the commander complained.

"No, it's perfect," Shel said quietly next to me.

Josephine, Leliana, and Cassandra followed us in.

"Alright, what's our next plan?" Josephine asked.

"We must prepare ourselves for Corypheus. He could come for us at any moment," Leliana said.

"I do not think he will strike again so soon," I chimed in.

"What makes you say that? He seemed pretty angry when we last saw him," Cullen said.

"He will need to reform his army. I imagine only he survived. And now that he knows the power you wield, he will need a different approach. We have some time to think," I said.

Shel nodded in agreement at what I had said, "Solas is right. The only one who could have survived that avalanche is The Elder One."

"We have made contact in Val Royeux in Orlais. A market vendor is interested in joining the Inquisition. We should connect with her. It might open other doors," Josephine suggested.

"To Orlais then!" Shel said excitedly. "In the meantime, Cullen, help get the villagers settled in. Let's regroup after our trip to Orlais. We will leave tomorrow morning."

After the group disbanded I opened the first door on my right to explore the castle a bit more. The short hallways led into a circular room. An over turned table laid in the center. I pulled it into its intended position and blew off the dust. I picked up some candles that had fallen on the floor and placed them on the table. I conjured a flame spell and lit all the candles at once. Another hall led out of the room onto a balcony.

"This place is even more beautiful in the flesh," a familiar voice said behind me.

I turned and looked at my visitor. "I hoped it would make you happy. It's suitable enough for the refugees. And this room will do quite nice as my study."

"I still have questions, you know."

"Oh, you wish to hear more about my travels?" I questioned her.

"No, I want to know more about you," Shel said crossing the room to where I was.

I looked at her confused. Hadn't I already told her about myself? "You know I am an apostate, sometimes dabbling in blood magic. I talk to spirits and dream frequently in the fade-"

"Yes, yes, I know all that already. I meant the kind of person you are. How you feel about things."

My feelings? I did not respond immediately to her and she continued to speak.

"Let's start with your favorite color?" she said as she smiled.

"I don't have a favorite color," I replied.

She frowned.

"Do you favor any color in particular?" I asked back politely.

"Orange, like when the sun sets in the sky," she said.

I smiled. I could not talk openly about my feelings, nor did I feel very confident about them either. I decided if she wanted to know more, I would have to take her to the place where I felt more comfortable speaking.

"You want to know more about me? Then, let's talk somewhere quieter," I said.

She nodded.

I whispered a spell in her ear and she fell asleep. I cradled her in my arms and closed my eyes as we entered the fade.

Shel appeared before me. We were back in Haven, a place I knew she liked and missed. She looked at me as if she could not remember what she was just doing. I took her hand and led her to the cells underneath the Chantry.

"This is where I first saw you. Cassandra and Leliana had you chained up here when they brought back from the temple where they found you. I studied the anchor on your hand while you slept."

"I'm glad you were watching over me," she said.

"You were a mystery to me, and you still are." I smiled to her and gently squeezed her hand as I led her back outside. The breach infected the sky.

"I told myself, one last attempt to seal the breach. I had no other plans if this one did not work out," I said glancing back at Shel. "You are the key to our salvation. You will change everyone. You've already changed the world, changed me."

Her eyebrows shot up in surprise. "Changing the world is one thing, but to change you? That seems a difficult task."

"Ha, it is."

She paused and smiled at me. She grabbed my arm and leaned in closer to my face. My mind took its time processing what happened next. She kissed me. My heart beat started racing. What was happening to me? My emotions were fluttering in my chest. She brought down my barriers I had worked so hard to maintain. I do not want her getting hurt. Taking this further would…complicate…everything.

My mind began to drift off. She stepped back with a disappointed look and turned to leave. No, I could not see her go. This moment we were having was too precious to me to let her go. I grabbed her and pulled her into an embrace and kissed her back. She leaned into me and oh, she felt amazing. Shel's lips tasted sweet like strawberries. I cradled her face and brushed her ears with my fingertips. I came to my senses, remembering where we were.

We broke off from our kiss.

"We shouldn't, it isn't right, not even here…" I began.

"What do you mean 'not here'?" Shel asked.

"Where did you think we were?"

She looked around. "This…isn't real."

I smiled at her. "That's a matter of debate, probably discussed after you…_wake up_."

I woke up in reality, ending our time in the fade. I looked down. Shel was still cradled in my arms. I watched her as her eyes slowly fluttered open. She stared up at me with her silver eyes. Oh, how they mesmerized me even here.

Her hand found its way up to my neck. She pulled me down and kissed me for real. Her lips pressed against mine, kissing me back. Her tongue sliding in and out of my mouth. I felt her body warmth. Her mana ran through me like electricity. My hand found its way to the crevice in her back. Her body was perfect, beautiful. I began to yearn for her. I wanted to consume her, envelope her forever.

We pulled away from our kiss and looked at each other. I stroked her hair with my hand. I kissed her once more on her forehead. She smiled and blinked in embarrassment.

"You are a wonderful mystery to me," I said.

That made her cheeks flush bright red. Her smiled widened.

I sat up, pulling her with me to a sitting position. We were both on the floor. I rose first, extending my hand to bring her to her feet. I took a deep breath, and gave her shoulders a light squeeze.

"You should go, finish exploring the castle. Come fetch me when you are ready to go to Orlais."

"Okay. I won't be long," she said.

I nodded and she turned and left the room. Suddenly I felt…lonely.


	7. A Friend in Need

Author's Note: So, I realized that I never posted chapter 7 as I was writing chapter 8, so here's two chapters that I combined into one.

Silvanna Nightlight: Thank you for being my first review! This chapter is for you! Enjoy!

Chapter 7: A Friend in Need

A man in a ridiculous Orlesian costume stopped us with an invitation to a salon, further in Val Royeux.

"Let's check it out," Shel said. Dorian, Cassandra, and I followed her out.

The directions to the Salon led to a grand Orlesian castle. Everyone was dressed their finest for the party. Of course Orlesian parties were not for me. I did not enjoy the grandeur people flashed, nor their snooty accents. But all that aside, we were here to support Shel.

I watched as she walked a hallway with her new acquaintance. Vivienne was the party's host and a mage like us, who wanted to support the Inquisition. I almost followed after them as they turned the corner, but Dorian interrupted me.

"Parties like this bring back old memories," Dorian said starting a conversation.

"With your parents, you mean?" I asked.

"Yes, at least when I was still a boy, before Tevinter," Dorian replied. "That woman over there needs a little something extra on that hat, don't you think?" Dorian said pointing to a woman with an extravagant hat.

"I feel underdressed," I said, chuckling at his sarcasm and Cassandra scoffed.

"The Orlesian support would be valuable to the inquisition. How many people are assassins at this party do you think?" Cassandra asked.

Dorian and I quieted our jokes. Cassandra usually put a damper on things.

"I hope Shel brings Vivienne on. She would truly be an asset," she said.

I considered Cassandra's view. She was correct. Shel needed powerful friends to build her army. She needed friends with influence.

Shel returned with her new friend sooner than expected. Vivienne was a marvelous sight, decked out in her Orlesian fancy ware. She was a fearful woman who had many influences in Val Royeux. Vivienne agreed to meet us back at Skyhold as she had some things to finalize before making the move.

We were finally on our way back to Skyhold. Upon our arrival, Varric burst out with questions about our time in Val Royeux. Shel was pulled into his gander.

I retreated into my chambers. I set my staff against the wall by the entrance and removed my pack. I reviewed my supplies. I did not need to restock as we were not attacked in Val Royeux. In fact, that journey had been uneventful, but long. With barely any rest when we reached Skyhold, I was mentally and physically beat. I undid the lace on my tunic and threw it over the chair. I laid down on my bench and kicked off my boots. The sun was going down as I closed my tired eyes and entered my dream world.

The fade blurred and became visible as I realized my surroundings. I was standing in the Exalted Plains.

"_Solas,_" a voice called out to me. I recognized the voice immediately. It was that of a wisdom spirit that I befriended in the Fade.

"_Solas, please help me_," she pleaded. I gazed around and found her chained to the ground near the water. Someone had summoned her against her will and she was stuck in reality. Her spirit remained, a whisp, in the Fade, barely even able to reach out to me.

I knelt in the grass in front of her.

"_I have been calling out for so long, for anyone to hear me. It has been quiet in the Fade without you. Where have you been?_"

My heart sank in my chest. I had let her down. "I was…distracted…"

"_By love,_" she said. I looked up at her, embarrassed. "_It is as clear as day. Do not feel ashamed. This elf you love is changing the world. You want an end to Corypheus' destruction? She is it_."

I nodded in agreement. "She truly is a wonder to me." I looked at my friend. This was not the conversation I wanted to be having. "Wisdom, what happened to you?"

"_Mages summoned me. They are torturing me for information I will not give. I am enraged. They have turned my soul into a demon. I never wanted this. I was happy just living here, in the Fade. Why did they do this? Why did they do this to me?_"

"I will find them to help you in any way I can."

"_Please hurry._"

My rest had not been long enough. I woke with a headache. The sky outside was dark. A candle had been lit in my room and tea brought to my table.

I picked up the cup of tea and sat in my chair at the table. Scrolls and books were sprawled about. Someone had been in here, studying. Shel? I wasn't certain, but if anyone, it would have been her. I sipped at my cup and put it down immediately in distaste.

"Something wrong with you tea?" Shel asked entering my room.

"It is tea. I detest the stuff."

"Then why drink it now?"

"I didn't think something made by you could taste so bitter," I admitted.

She smiled and came to stand behind my chair. I felt her arms embrace me from behind. Her scent filling my nostrils. I sighed under her embrace. She released me and sat on the edge of the table in front of me.

"What's on your mind, Solas?"

"I need a favor," I said.

"You just have to ask," she assured me.

I smiled at this pure heart standing before me. "One of my oldest friends has been captured, summoned by mages, forced into a slavery. I heard the cry for help as I slept. My friend is a spirit of wisdom."

"A spirit?"

"Yes, but this spirit was content, dwelling happily in the fade. It only wants to return to the Fade."

"Why would the mages summon your friend?" she asked me.

"I'm not sure. It has a great deal of lore and history. But any mage could learn that by visiting it in the fade. They would have no need to summon it to learn that…the spirit could be resisting giving them information and that may be why it's being tortured."

"We'll find a way to save your friend," she said holding my hands.

I looked up at her. I had no right asking this favor of her. "Thank you. I got a sense of my friend's location before I woke."

"Let's go save this spirit," she said, kissing my lips. My heart skipped as her lips kissed mine. I felt her comfort embrace me. She stood up, releasing my hands as she walked around my chair to exit.

The Exalted Plains were just as I remembered them in The Fade. Grass the greenest in Thedas, trees as tall as the sky, remnants of ancient elven ruins still barely standing and covered in ivy. The air was so fresh here.

We made our way towards the coast. We hit the rocky area and saw a bloody body lying in the sand. Its body covered in scratches.

"Looks like demons," Varric said examining it closer.

Shel had brought Varric along with us. She knew Varric and I were friendly and I very much enjoyed his company.

She saw a rift in the distance. I knew she wanted to close it so we made a little side trip to close it. Nothing out of the ordinary. The demons seemed to be getting easier to fight and she seemed to be closing rifts faster now.

After she closed it, we walked back to our original trail. We came across a second body. Dred flowed over me as it had the same scratches on it as the first. My friend. She was in pain. She would never attack people. Whoever did this to her would pay.

I looked up from the body as we heard a roar in the distance. Shel scrambled into the sand. Rocks lined our path. We rushed forward only to be intercepted by a mage.

"My friend," I whispered as I saw the spirit. No, she was now a demon. We were too late.

"Your friend is a demon?!" Shel said. "I thought this was a spirit of wisdom."

"It is. A spirit becomes a demon when it is denied its original purpose."

"So those mages summoned it for their own purposes…" Shel said. "Why?"

"Blood magic can be used to control it…maybe…" Varric started.

"Let us ask them," I said.

The mage standing in front of us was heaving. He placed his hands on his knees as he hunched over. After letting out a low breath, he stood up.

"Got any extra lyrium potions? We've exhausted our supply trying to destroy this demon," the mage said.

My anger welled up inside me. It took all my strength to not punch the mage where he stood. "Demon?! You summoned it here against its will and now it has become a demon. It used to be a gentle spirit, wandering happily in the fade."

"What would you know about demons?" the mage said in defense.

_What would I know? WHAT WOULD I KNOW?_ My anger become too much for me to control, but Shel spoke up first.

"More than you," Shel said back, readying her staff. "You better watch who you're talking to."

"It's just a worthless demon!" the mage cried.

"SHUT UP!" I yelled.

"Solas," Shel said trying to calm my anger. "We may be able to still save your friend. If I can destroy the barriers from the mages, we may be able to give it peace," Shel said.

"It's worth a shot, better it die in peace than die a demon," I muttered. "Move aside, mage!"

The mage cowered to the side and let us pass.

The demon noticed our approach. I could not contain my sadness. Fen'Harel was in the back of my mind. I was almost willing to let the Dred Wolf out to kill these pathetic fools. But Shel was already destroying the first barrier. Wisdom became stronger as the first barrier fell. Varric was shooting arrows into its legs to distract it from Shel. I could not bare to hurt my friend so I assisted Shel in destroying the rest of the barriers.

Varric keeping the demon distracted was not enough. It lashed out as an arrow went through its thigh. Its claws scratched at my back, tearing my vest. The cuts on my back were exposed and blood began seeping out of the cuts. My blood loss made me feel faint. I leaned on my staff, exhausted as Shel destroyed the last barrier.

The demon disappeared and my spirit friend appeared before me.

"Wisdom, I am so sorry," I said, gazing upon her, hoping she would forgive me.

"_Thank you_," she said smiling at me then at Shel.

I felt the wind brush across my face and blew her wisp away. Just like that, my friend vanished. I would never see her again. Shel placed her hand on my shoulder. But my rage had not calmed. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw the group of mages, and that pathetic mage that stopped us with them.

I sliced my hand, preparing my blood magic spell. I would curse them for the rest of their miserable lives. Blood dripped to the ground as I began muttering the spell.

A cage of lightening encased me. I looked up at the mages. None of them had cast it. I looked back at Shel. She had her hand outstretched, staff pointing at me as she concentrated her spell.

"Don't do it Solas," I saw her mouth the words.

"They must pay for what they did!" I growled.

"Not like this," Shel pleaded, releasing her spell.

The cage disappeared around me. My head whipped back to the mages who were watching what was happening. This time I didn't even mutter the spell. I released my energy. My blood pierced through each of their hearts within a second. They all fell to the floor, dead. I had exacted my revenge.

"No Solas!" Shel cried. She fell to her knees. I knew she didn't want me to kill them. If I hadn't have killed them, the Dred Wolf would have done my job. She can't find out.

I couldn't bear the look on her face. I turned toward the water.

"Don't follow me," I said over my shoulder. I started running. Away from what I had done and away from her.

"Solas…" I heard her plea as I fled.

"Let him go," I heard Varric said, comforting her.

I ran fast into the forest, branches scratching at my face and clothes. My mind was racing with so much emotion. Tears streamed down my face. Not for killing those mages. No, I cried because in my heart I did not want to kill them. I wanted to listen to Shel. Why hadn't I been strong enough to stop myself? My heart was beating out of my chest.

I did not know how long I ran for. Sweat dripped from my brow. I slowed my pace, eventually coming to a stop. I looked back to see if by chance I had been followed, but I saw no one. I leaned up against the nearest tree, letting myself catch my breath. The forest was growing dark as I watched the sun set between the trees. I knew not where I was, but all seemed quiet. I had to confront the Dred Wolf about today's events.

I climbed a sturdy tree and set wards on the ground. I knew I did not have long, but I needed to see him. I drifted asleep after setting one final barrier around myself.

I woke up in the Fade. Of course it had to be here…I was standing on the shore where my friend had perished.

_At least she was set free by that woman_, a voice behind me said.

There he was. The Dred Wolf, not but a wisp of shadow in the Fade.

"I did not want to kill those mages," I said.

The Dred Wolf looked at me, smirking. _You do not know what you want_.

No, it's not that I don't know, I was just too afraid to tell him. And how could I tell him? How do you tell the spirit living inside of you that you wish to be alone? I wanted nothing more to do with the Dred Wolf. I wish he hadn't made a deal with me to retrieve the orb.

_See what I mean?_ He said, reading my thoughts. _You are no longer the Solas I kept the bargain with. I see no more use for you_.

"What are you saying? You're going to kill me?"

_No, your body serves a purpose in reality. It is your mind that you have no use of anymore. That elven girl must be missing you by now. No doubt she was hurt when you left her. Let's go meet her, shall we?_

"Let's?"

_Yes, you and me as one, Solas. She deserves the truth. _

"No, you cannot take me," I said. I reached for my staff and realized I did not have it with me.

The Dred Wolf smirked again. _I already have_.

The Fade disappeared and everything went black.

My eyes opened. My eyes? I was looking down on myself. There I lay in the tree.

I was waking. My body was waking. My body. Not me. That soulless shell. No. This cannot be happening. Shel, she would…Shel….my mind snapped. I needed to find her before the Dred Wolf did in my body.

I gazed around, found my bearings. I was stuck in this middle world between reality and the Fade. My soul could travel anywhere it wanted to. I imagined Skyhold and the courtyard where Cullen had his command post and suddenly my vision came to life. My soul was in the courtyard. I looked desperately for Shel. I prayed that she had not met my soulless body.

My heart beat became frantic. I worried that she had already met my body. The Dred Wolf. I didn't see her. Or Varric.

Shouts from the gate rang through Skyhold, announcing the Inquisitor had returned. I looked toward the gate. There she stood with Varric. They were just returning from their journey. That means my body would take time also to return. I had to meet her before he did. It's possible, maybe I could meet her in the fade. Warn her.

I watched her until the sun set over the mountains. When she finally laid her head down for rest, I found her in the Fade.


	8. Warning

Author's note: Rating has been changed to 'M' for some graphic smut this chapter.

Chapter 8: Warning

I wandered the Fade, watching her dream unfold before me. The memory of the day replayed in her head. I saw her face sadden as the dream lapsed to the part where she caged me with her spell. This time, she held me until I calmed down. With my emotions under control, I left the mages alone. This is what she wanted. But it wasn't me.

"Shel," I called behind her.

She turned around. Her eyes searching the Fade, not looking at me. I looked down at my hands. My body was a shadow, a wisp, just like my friend, Wisdom.

"Solas?" she called out.

"I'm here," I replied.

Her eyes still searched for me, but they flickered to my shadow with doubt. She walked toward me, toward my shadow.

I wanted to scream for letting the Dred Wolf take me. I was weak. Pitiful.

"I'm here, this is me," I said.

"I don't understand. What's happening to you?" she asked.

"I don't know how much time I have, but you must know, something is coming. But, it's not me."

"Solas, what happened? Why did you run off like that?"

I'm a coward, that's why. I should have listened to you. You only wanted to help, a true friend. I let my emotions control me, and I paid the price, heavily.

I didn't answer her.

"When are you coming back?" she asked.

"Soon, Lethallin."

"You said _something_ was coming. What is it?" she asked.

"You've heard the tale about the Dred Wolf?"

Her brow furrowed. "Fen'Harel? The one from the elven tales?"

"Yes," I said. "He's the betrayer…and he just betrayed me."

"What are you saying? You know him personally?" she asked.

"Something like that…"

"You're not making any sense. Gah! You're so frustrating! First you have to kill those mages, then you run off without talking to me, and now you're talking to me in riddles?!"

Wait, what? She just flipped…

"I'm tired, Solas. Leave me alone."

Where was this coming from? Why the sudden change?

"Shel," I said, but she vanished, waking up from her dream in reality.

I woke, stills tuck in the middle world. I watched her roll out of bed, clutching her forehead. She stormed out on to her balcony and let several lightning bolts shoot from her hands in frustration. I heard her call my name as she released her anger.

Then there was a knock on her door.

It was Varric, telling her that I had returned. Fear crept under my skin. I followed her into the courtyard. She walked briskly to the gate. As the gate opened, she stood there, her hands were balled into fists. Her eyes were set on my body, determined to punch me.

The Dred Wolf started to say something, but her punch met his lip first. He stumbled back in surprise, but he did not attack her back. She punched him again, this time missing, as he grabbed her fist before it met his face.

My heart jumped as he put his arms around her waist and pulled her toward his body and kissed her. My rage welled.

_Don't you dare touch her_. My mind thought it could reach his thoughts, but there was nothing.

"Lethallin, forgive me," he said releasing her.

She slapped his face, not ready to give up. I saw tears falling down her cheeks.

"You idiot! You had me so worried!"

The Dred Wolf looked surprised as to the reason why she slapped him. She worried about me? But she was so angry in the Fade.

He hung his head. "I'm sorry, I should have listened to you."

She huffed. "Just don't leave like that again, ok?" she said placing her hands on her hips.

The Dred Wolf smiled at her. _Don't smile at her you thief. You don't even know her_. She jumped up and hugged him. She hugged him, that no good Fen'Harel. If only she knew who she was talking to. Her love for me made her blind.

I continued to watch her and The Dred Wolf's deception. He fooled her good. She did not doubt my body. That night I watched, horrified, as they climbed into bed together.

Upon entering her room, she began taking off his armor and he undid her robes. Her body was completely exposed to him and his to hers. Neither of their bodies perfect, as they both had scars.

Her hands held his face, as she stared into his eyes. He held her back. His hands began caressing her body, finding the crevice in her back. His hands moved to her bare hips, and pulled her against his hard body.

_Fuck_.

Their lips found each other, unable to part from the other.

_I'm not even in the room and I can feel the hot sticky air_.

They pulled away from each other for an instant. He scooped her up and carried her to her bed. He laid her down. Her breasts fell plump to her sides. He gazed at her pale body.

_She's so beautiful_. My heart ached. _He's raping you, deceiving you. That's not me. Shel, that's not me. _

The Dred Wolf climbed over her onto the bed, kissing her belly, then her ribs. He planted a kiss in the crevice between her breasts, on her shoulder bones, moving up to plant one on her throat. Her lips parted to prepare for his kiss on her mouth as his tongue wiggled its way to the inside of her mouth.

Their breaths were hot and heavy. He brushed her hair away from her face. He positioned himself on top of her and thrust inside her. Her hips rose in response to his movement. She grabbed his hips and encouraged him further.

_That's not me!_

I could not stand to watch for another second. I trembled, unable to control myself, I released my energy, trying to break the barrier that held me to this middle world. This had to stop now.

"SHEL!" I cried, hoping she could hear my voice, willing her to hear my voice.

It didn't work. I searched for a way to reconnect to my body, looking for a rift, a tear in the veil, anything that could give me a way back.

Then, I saw it. On my body was a red mark on the back of my neck. I leaned down, closer to The Dred Wolf. I had never seen that mark before. I reached out with my hand and touched it. As I did it, the Dred Wolf lifted a hand to the back of his neck, pausing for a moment and turning his head, as if a presence had touched him, but returned his attention to Shel.

I think it worked.

I touched him again. He did the same thing, this time not returning to his actions.

"Solas?" Shel asked concerned.

"I thought I felt something, maybe it's nothing," he said.

I thrust my hand as fast and as hard as I could this time. The veil split open and the air cracked. The Dred Wolf leaned back and howled at the pain. He scratched at the back of his neck, getting up from where he was.

Shel watched him wrestle with himself, as she grabbed the blankets to cover her naked body.

"_Be gone demon!_" I yelled at the Dred Wolf, or was it my body saying that?

"_You'll regret this!_" he said back to me.

"_Leave me alone!_" I ripped apart the veil with all my strength. _You will not have her. You will not…have her! _

I opened my eyes, unsure if I was in my body, or still stuck in the middle world.

"Solas?" Shel asked worried.

I looked around. My hands. My feet. My boner…oh my… I was back in my body. Relief flooded over me and I passed out.


	9. Confession

Chapter 9: Confession

Light flooded into me and I opened my eyes. The sun shined so brightly through the window. Window. I gazed around, panicked for a second, and then realized where I was. I was lying in Shel's bed, alone, and thankfully in my clothes. The memories of last night flashed through my mind. My heart began racing. Where was Shel?

I stumbled out of the bed. The room was quiet. Too quiet. I opened her door, composing myself before I left. I descended the stairs that led into the main hall of Skyhold. People were going about their daily business. I spotted Varric in a corner. His eyes met mine and he raised his eyebrows, surprised to see me coming out of Shel's room, alone. Surprised? Really? I could hear the gossip about our relationship on the lips of the commoners in the hall. Varric pointed to a door further in the hall. I nodded, thankful for him pointing me in the direction I needed to go. To see Shel.

The door he pointed to was the war room. _The words the shemlen use for rooms…why name it the war room? _

I opened the door from the hall and found Josephine sitting at her desk, sprawling notes on parchment. She looked up briefly and smiled, then went back to her writing.

I hesitated on the door to the war room. I could hear muffled voices behind the door. There was no arguing going on this time, _thank goodness_. Shel's voice was clear as day, strong, and calm. I turned the handle, interrupting her. I had to talk to her now. The door opened.

" – I can blend in. If I take Dorian, yourself, and Sol…." Shel was saying. She stopped, hearing the door open, and turned to look at me. "Solas…" she said quietly.

I watched her expression change to concern. She turned back to the group to address them.

"We will be there. Tell Josephine to accept the invitation," she said. Cassandra nodded and glanced at Cullen who shrugged. With that, she turned and walked toward me, grabbing my arm, a little too tightly, as she led me out of the war room. Josephine brushed past us, hearing her name and the door shut behind us. Shel released my arm, but did not look at me. I was the first to break the silence.

"Shel," I started to say, but she raised her hand to silence me.

"Don't. Right now, I get to ask the questions," she said.

I nodded and she finally looked up at me.

"What happened last night?" she asked.

"I was…I…" I struggled to find the words. "I don't know," I finally told her.

"Yes you do. You know exactly what happened. Tell me."

I looked at her eyes. Those eyes would never look at me again if she knew the truth. But the lies were too much. Lying was just as bad as telling the truth. She needed to know. I almost started to tell her, but Josephine came back out of the doors. We both broke our gaze and watched her retreat to her desk, then I looked back at Shel.

"Let's talk somewhere more private."

"No, I'm not going to the Fade with you," Shel said.

"I know, I meant your chambers. I promise to tell you everything. But _only _you," I said.

She held out her arm to usher me down the hall way. She followed after me. I climbed the stairs to her chamber first, she followed closely behind me. When we reached the top, she opened the door for me and let me into her room, closing the door behind her. She walked over to her windows and shut them so no one could hear our conversation from outside. This was it. This was _really _it. My secret would be out.

"Ok, we have privacy, now talk," she said.

I let out a sigh, letting my body relax. "I was possessed."

"I figured as much. What as it? A pride demon? No, maybe a desire demon?" she asked.

"No demon," I shook my head.

"What else could possess a mage if not a demon?"

"An ancient elven god," I said. "Fen'Harel," I said it. I told her! My heart was pounding in my ears and out of my chest. I tried so hard to contain my emotions and brace myself for what would come next.

"The Dred Wolf?" she questioned. She didn't believe me. I knew she wouldn't.

"Yes, we have a…contract…so to say," I said.

"What sort of contract?" she asked, her eyes narrowed at me.

"Coryephus was becoming too powerful. We both had the desire to bring back to Old Gods so they may make the world right again. We were going to use it against Corypheus, betray him. I gave it to him, the Orb. We needed him to think he had the advantage. Then we were going to hit him hard. But then you disrupted the plans when Coryephus gave you the anchor," I paused to let her take in the information. When she didn't respond, I kept going.

"I told Fen'Harel that I no longer wanted to go through with the original plan. I told him I did not want to give the orb back to him, but to the elven clans so that they may protect it so that no one could use its magic. You time traveled, saw the future, saw what would happen if the Old Gods would awaken. I did not want that to come true. My plans changed, my life changed when I met you."

She did not look at me, but at the ground. I wished I could read the thoughts in her mind. No doubt there were many.

Finally, I watched her take in a deep breath and slowly release.

"When did Fen'Harel possess your body?" she asked.

"When I left you, after killing those mages."

She turned her whole body away from me.

"I'm so sorry, Shel."

"That wasn't you, last night that wasn't you," I strained myself to hear her quiet, trembling voice. "How could I be so blind?"

"Shel," I started to say. I needed to calm her down. Comfort her. Something! What should I do?

"You tried to warn me in the Fade. But I didn't know _that_ wasn't you!" she cried.

She collapsed to her knees. I rushed to her, embracing her as hard as I could. Tears bled through my vest. Her hair was wet, from sweat. No, from my tears. I cursed myself for letting this happen, for not being a stronger mage.

"I'm so sorry this happened. I should have been stronger to fight off his influence. I love you Shel, I won't let him touch you again!"

She did nothing but cry. I did nothing but hold her while my rage welled up inside my heart with every tear that fell to her hair.


	10. Care to Dance?

Author's Note: it's been a while! SORRYYY! This chapter is super short, but it's all I could think about writing.

Happy reading :)

Chapter 10: Care to Dance?

I held her throughout the night and she fell asleep in my arms. I dared not leave her side nor fall asleep. She slept so peacefully.

Fen'Harel would pay for what he's done. Screw the plan with Coryephus. I needed to get the orb back and into safe hands, but I needed Shel's help to do it. _I really screwed things up_.

The time for the Orlesian ball drew near and we headed for it decked out in Orlesian Fancy Wear. Shel looked exquisite. She wore a red dress and a blue sash. Her hair was pulled back into a light bun, held together with a glittering broach, no doubt a gift from Dorian, with wisps of bangs shaping her face.

Leliana and Josephine accompanied us along with Cassandra and Dorian. Quite a team for a ball, if you ask me. Shel was right to bring everyone along though, I just didn't understand why she ignored me most of the time until we realized that there were Orlesian politics to deal with behind the curtain. What a mess.

It wasn't until the end of the night, after all was settled, was I able to spend some time with Shel alone.

"Would you care to dance?" I asked, approaching her from behind.

She was leaning on the balcony rail looking out over the city.

She sighed.

"I'm sorry, it's been a long night," she replied.

I bowed my head, embarrassed that I had asked her.

"Shel, we need to talk about things," I started.

"There's nothing to talk about," she replied flatly. "I understand what happened with you and Fen'Harel. I just…"

I looked at her questioningly.

"I need to know you're on my side."

"I'm with you, Shel," I replied immediately. That's what was bothering her.

She smiled at me.

"Ok," was all she said as she turned away looking back over the city again.

"Shel," I stepped beside her, placing my hand on her back. Her face was shielded behind her bangs. I brushed them aside and saw her eyes had tears falling from them. I cradled her face in my hands as if it were the most precious thing I have ever held. She didn't deserve this. She didn't deserve me.

"I'm sorry," she said wiping away her tears. "I just have so much on my mind. First Coryephus wants to kill me, now the Dred Wolf? What's next?"

Damn the creators.

"Nothing is next. I will not let the Dred Wolf or Coryephus touch you. I promise I won't leave your side again."

She breathed. A sigh of relief, perhaps? She wrapped her arms around my waist and buried her head against my chest. I held her tightly back.

"Stay with me, fight with me," she whispered.

"You know I will," I answered back.

I heard the music from the ballroom playing in the distance. A ballad that I recognized. I pulled away slightly from Shel and turned her chin to meet mine and softly planted a kiss on her lips. Without speaking, I took her hand in mine and guided her back on the balcony. Our feet stepped in rhythm with the music and we spun around each other until the song ended and we left the party hand in hand.

We arrived back in Skyhold as night fell. I started toward my quarters when Shel's hand dragged me up the stairs to her bedroom instead.

When we were both inside her room, she shut the door and turned to me and kissed me. Her hands brushed my ears and she held my face. The kiss surprised me, I had not predicted that she would have taken the lead like that.

"Solas, I want _you_ to make love to me tonight."

_What?_ "What? Are you sure?" She had only slept with _me_, or the Dred Wolf, on accident several nights ago. You would think it would be too soon.

She grabbed my shoulders and looked up at me. "I love you Solas, I want to make things right between us."

"Sex won't make things right, lethalin."

"It's not sex…it's love," she said, stepping closer to me.

"Are you sure you're not possessed?"

"Pretty sure," she said nipping at my neck.

I closed my eyes feeling her lips kiss me, sending shivers down my body. Her hands fumbled at the top tie of my tunic and then spread over my bare chest, making their way down over my belly, reaching my belt.

No.

"Wait," I whispered, my breath gone from my lungs. I opened my eyes to look at her. Sometime between all the touching and kisses she had managed to remove all of her clothes. _How did I miss that?_

"Solas, it's alright," she said.

She grabbed my hand and placed it upon her chest. Her skin was hot as she covered my hand with hers, placing it directly above her heart.

"Feel my heart beat," she said.

I felt her chest, each time she pulsed, her heart sent beats into my skin, syncing my heart with hers. I had never felt this kind of power before.

My naked body, her soft body, the soft bed, the soft pillows, her soft kisses. Clouds. I was floating, letting Shel pull me through the air. Her hips atop mine, her hands upon my ribs, her hair falling in front of her face, body so warm. Soft, slow, sweet, raw, beautiful. She was beautiful. She was love.

Our hearts beat faster, hips rising faster, our breaths hotter. All her movements electrifying my senses. Tongues clashing, teeth clicking, lips pursing, sweat dripping. We were together as one. My face wanting, her face willing, her legs clenching. Hips thrusting harder, legs clenching harder. I couldn't take it anymore, I thrust up one final time feeling the release. Feeling her love. Feeling her tighten. Feeling all of her.

We drifted into the fade.


	11. The Dred Wolf

Chapter 11: The Dred Wolf

I woke in the Fade, alone. I figured Shel must have drifted into her dreams and not the Fade, which I was glad. I took this opportunity for myself to confront the Dred Wolf about what he had done. My anger toward him was rightfully justified, but Shel's safety was on my mind.

It didn't take long for him to find me.

"_Solas_," a voice called to me. I recognized it immediately and spun around, facing my greeter.

"Fen'Harel," I growled.

"_That is no way to greet me!_" it jested toward me.

"Stay out of my head. You do not deserve to use my body as a medium again."

Straight to the point. I was done playing his mind games.

"_Oh, I don't plan on it. That little display was all I needed. Soon, you will lose your control_."

"Shut up. I refuse to listen to you," I said. Then I tried, with all my might, to leave the Fade, but something blocked me. I couldn't move. "What did you do?"

An unseen barrier held me in my place.

"_I can't have you leave yet. She is coming_."

"Who? Who is coming?"

"_Someone very close to you_," Fen'Harel hissed.

Shel. There she was. She had entered the Fade at the wrong time. I ran to her, putting myself between The Dred Wolf and her.

"_Shel Levallan_," he hissed.

"Don't talk to her," I growled.

"Fen'Harel!" she called from behind me.

I closed my eyes at the sound of her voice and turned around to look at her. What was she doing? She touched my arm, trying to give me assurance. Her eyes told me she had a plan, of course.

The Dred Wolf looked at Shel expectantly.

"I think it's time you and I had a talk," Shel said.

"_Mmmmm, yes, let's talk. I remember out last conversation. You wanted me. Never wanted me to leave_," Fen'Harel said with a smirk.

"Now, that's slightly unfair because I was unaware it was you I was talking to. In fact, I would consider this our first conversation," she said stepping next to me. I looked down at her, unsure just what exactly she was planning. I knew she was strong, but this was a god she was talking to. Did she understand that?

"_Then, if that is true, how about we review you last words with me none the less. You never want Solas to leave you again, is that correct_?" he asked.

Shel nodded, waiting to hear what he would say next. I felt I already knew what was next to come.

"_And Solas is also dear to me. You have something I want._"

"No, Coryephus has something you want," she replied.

Fen'Harel looked confused for only a second, as did I.

"The Orb," I said, catching up to her thoughts.

She gave me a soft smile.

_No, she wouldn't…_

"I will give you the Orb in exchange that you leave Solas alone," she said.

"No," I spat beside her.

It was a pitiful plea really. The Dred Wolf would never leave me alone. She did not understand the full _relationship_ we had. It wasn't something you could just leave to a promise. Ties would have to be broken in order for any of this to work. But giving the Orb back to Fen'Harel? There were worse things than being tied to the blasted God.

"Shel, you do not know the power that he could wield if he had the Orb," I whispered to her.

"I will not let him possess you again," she said.

_Oh Shel_. She was naïve in her thinking.

"_Possess,_" Fen'Harel hissed. "_You think it is possession, the power I have over Solas is greater than possession. Our souls our bound_."

"What does he mean, Solas?" Shel asked me.

"_Solas. One of his many names, I am afraid,_" Fen'Harel drifted toward us, looking at me, fixing his eyes on me. Knowing my soul, knowing my heart.

There it was. If she understood then, I was unsure. I lost all control. The Dred Wolf took me. Hunger set in. My hands and feet shifted into claws, my body curved forward forcing me on all fours, and my teeth became fangs, dripping in drool. Fen'Harel flooded my mind, my eyes opened as the beast I had become and I saw Shel standing in horror at my feet.

"Solas?" she whispered.

"Solas is gone. You speak to the Dred Wolf now," a voice said. Not my voice. I had no control. The Dred Wolf and I were one.

She looked hurt for a brief second, but then leveled her shoulders.

"You hurt me," she said.

The Dred Wolf cocked his head.

"I trusted you and you hurt me," she said.

"That, my young elf, is why I am the Dred Wolf."

"The Betrayer," she muttered.

"That is one of my many names, yes."

"How can I get Solas back?" she asked.

"Solas, that _elf_, is gone," the Dred Wolf growled.

_I was there though, my voice unheard, my thoughts dormant, but I was there, a wisp of a memory in the Dred Wolf. He was controlling my mind. NO! I won't let you take complete control. _

_Shut up, go back to your pitiful demise. Forget the young elf. You are mine._

_NO! Shel! _

The Dred Wolf shook his head, closing his eyes. Shel took notice and squinted her eyes. She grabbed the wolf's face, staring into his eyes.

_She sees me, I know she sees me. _

"Solas is not gone," she said. "And I will have him back." She did not release the face she held. "I will bring you the Orb and you will cut all ties binding you to Solas."

"Solas is mine. The Solas you know is a lonely elf whose sole purpose is to serve me. You will not take…" the Dred Wolf trailed off as he looked at Shel. His eyes traveled down her body to her stomach and widened at the unforeseen effects that were taking place in her body.

_Your seed._

_My seed._

_You didn't Solas. _

_She is mine. She will always be mine and he is mine. _

_That is if she lives through it. _

_She will._

_You are certain? Childbirth is a fifty-fifty chance. _

_He will live and he will have my name. _

The Dred Wolf sat in silence. Shel was confused as ever by his actions though when she looked in his eyes, they flickered as an ongoing battle was taking place in his head.

"Solas…is…yours," the Dred Wolf said silently.

"What? Just like that?" Shel asked placing her hands on her hips, confused as to the sudden surrender from the Dred Wolf.

"Bring me the Orb and I will release the binding," he said.

_No, you will not take him._

_It has been decided Solas. When he is born, I will enter into him. This is the payment I will make with you. If you truly love her as much as you say you do, I will leave you, but another soul I must take. _

_Please. I will be yours forever, don't touch my son._

_I have already lost you. There is no point in keeping you now. _

This was my fault. There was no stopping the future.

"How do I know you will keep your promise?" Shel asked, invading thoughts between the Dred Wolf.

"I will release Solas back to you now. You can confirm with him that our ties are truly cut."

Shel had never dealt with a god before and did not know the consequences. Here she was tangled up in my mess. Damn Fen'Harel.

_Yes, damn me. I will release you now, Solas. You can continue living in that mundane body of yours with the mundane mistake you have made. You should have never betrayed me, Solas. _

I was cast down to the ground. My world spun. Strings at my heart tugged in my chest. I was gasping for air as the hold on my heart was tight. My chest caved in until I felt the release of the strings being cut. Air flowed through my lungs breathing new life into me. My fingertips tingled as my touch returned to me. My ears rang as sound returned to me. I finally opened my eyes, fully awake now.

I was back in Shel's room, with Shel cuddled next to me. My eyes grew wide at her naked body next to mine. I jumped out of the bed remembering the Fade. Remembering what Fen'Harel did. Shel woke to the sudden movement and looked sleepily at me. It was still night outside.

"Solas?" she asked.

I searched myself for any signs of an extra passenger, but the Dred Wolf was gone. Our bond had been cut. I clutched my heart.

"Solas?" Shel asked again, this time standing up from the bed and making her way over to me.

"Stay back," I warned. I had to be sure before I touched her.

She backed away slowly looking hurt. I searched my mind, no trace. My hand trembled. I was truly alone.

I looked at her. Her body was so beautiful in the moonlight. The light emphasized her curves and yet she stood before me, completely exposed, trusting me fully. It was unwise of her.

Nine months. Was it truly worth it to have nine months with her? Better to end it now than later. Later would be too hard as she would be heavy with child. I couldn't bear to leave her then.

"I must go," I said hastily as I picked up my clothing.

"No, you need to explain what happened to me. I don't fully understand everything that damn god said," Shel said grabbing my arm.

I couldn't tell her. She would find out soon enough. But, she deserved to know the truth. But, I wasn't ready to face the truth. How could we be certain though? It was just hours ago when I released my seed into her.

A healer could know.

I turned to face Shel, the elf I loved, who laid with me, slayed demons, closed rifts, who befriended a Tevinter Altus, of all people. She could handle this. But first, I needed a healer. A skilled healer. A healer that only I trusted with this information.

"There is someone I need to talk to," I finally said.

Shel cocked her head at me, clearly expecting me to say something else. She waited for me to continue.

"I must be certain, before I explain. I know you have questions, and I want to answer them, but I have to be absolutely positive about something before I explain anything."

"How long will you be?" she asked.

Varric or The Champion might know of his whereabouts. But even if they knew where he was, it would take at least a week to find him and another week to bring him back here. Shel would certainly feel…something…by then.

"Several weeks," I replied.

"Several weeks?! Solas, you can't leave for that long, not after tonight," she pleaded with me.

She was right of course. I couldn't leave her alone for that long. But, if she got injured during a battle along the way, too much stress could…

No. Better she comes along. I can protect her.

"You're right. I do not know how long it will take to find him," I said. "You should come with me."

Upon hearing this, Shel threw the covers off her body, climbed out of bed, and embraced me.

"You only have to ask," she whispered.

There I go again, asking her for favors. The Inquisitor.

I pushed her away slightly, still holding her arms and kissed her. It was passionate, desperate a little even. But she was so welcoming. Her fingertips brushed the bottoms of my ears sending pleasant chills down my spine. My hand lay over her heart, just above her breast, feeling her pulse quicken. I deepened the kiss, pushing Shel back to the bed.

My hands traveled her body. My lips kissed her mouth, finding their way down her throat tasting Shel's smooth skin. I could hear her chest rise with her breath and felt her breasts gently rise to brush against my chest. That was all the invitation I needed to fondle her breasts. Her chest jolted up at my touch, wanting more. I gave her a quick glance as I made my way down to her hard pink nipples and kissed the one on the right, teasing her left with my fingers. I couldn't help it, my hips rolled against hers, letting her know just how hard I was. I felt her arms wrap around my hips, encouraging my movements and pulling me closer, down to her, and onto the bed.

"Solas, please," she whimpered. "Don't stop."

I climbed on top of her, pressing my knees between her thighs. Her neck extended and she reached up, grabbing my neck down, and kissed my lips. I pulled back, taking in her body. Her full breasts fell slightly to the sides of her ribs. She was breathtaking and she was mine.

"Shel," I said softly.

"Yes?"

"I love you so much," I managed to choke out.

Her eyes teared up. "I love you too," she said.

I kissed her breasts, working my way down to her rib cage. I kissed her side, her belly button, and her hip bones.

"Solas," she whispered, her hand gently touched the top of my head.

I looked up at her. Kissing her once more just above her citreous, breathing deeply to smell her arousal. No more teasing. My face met hers in a kiss as I slowly positioned myself on top of her. I pushed inside her, feeling her muscle tighten around me. She was dripping for me and I for her. I kissed her lips again, this time sucking them with a deep passion. She kissed me back with equal passion inviting me for more. I pulled out, then pushed back in, her hips responded under me moving against my hips.

My mouth hovered over her breast, nipping at her hard nipples, waiting to feel for her orgasm. I felt her squeeze around me, her back arched from underneath me. Her eyes were shut and a low moan escaped from her lips as she clung to me.

I pushed harder and faster into her feeling her tightness as I came inside her, filling her to the brim. My cock throbbed and pulsed inside her. As I kissed her lips, I pulled out, dripping, feeling her leak at my retreat.

Our breaths were hot against each other's skin. She was trembling under me. I rolled onto my side and held her tightly. Her hot breath eased against my chest and we drifted off the sleep for the rest of the night. Shel entered her dreams, I entered the Fade again that night.


End file.
